Beauty is only skin deep!

The classic Beauty and the Beast is brought crashing into the 21st century in this modern remake. Starring the relatively unknown Alex Pettyfer (I Am Number Four) and Vanessa Hudgens. Who, in a desperate stuggle to shake off her good girl image stars as a nerdy damsel-in-distress who is taken into arrogant idiot-turned-hideous beast Alex/Hunter's care when her addict father has a run in with some dealers. Following a party, Kendra (Olsen Twin turned scary uber goth) wreaks havok, turning Alex into Hunter, a tattoo'd, scarred and metal faced beast. Personally, I've seen worse at the local metal nights! Taken into consideration that all it takes to scare a school full of American teens is a row of teeth one shade duller than brilliant white, and an extra pound of weight and well Hunter must be the epitome of ugly.

The spitting image of Jasper from Twilight, Alex is punished for being arrogant and obsessed with looks, this isn't the only likeness this has to Twilight; it practically drips with teen angst and hormones gone haywire! Hudgens plays her part well, considering it's mostly an empty shell with the odd 'I can take care of myself!' tantrum just to dupe you into thinking she's actually real. It doesn't help that she has a really annoying and whiny voice and at times I actually struggled to understand what she was saying. Luckily, between her epic moments of txt spk on some kind of Facebook rip off and unconvincing desire to leave Hunter's trap (I mean 'care') there is quite a good soundtrack to the film.

We're introduced to the long suffering housekeeper Zola (Lisa Gay Hamilton) who is missing her family back over in Jamaica, she puts up with Alex's jibes and digs with an air of nonchalance and a fantastic accent. Once Alex becomes Hunter his clearly horrified father bungs him in a typical 'apartment' (aka a mansion in a big city) with a, get this, blind tutor. How's that for fatherly love?! Rob the blind tutor (Neil Patrick Harris) is easily the best, and most talented actor in this film, his quick quips and comebacks are profound and funny.

It's about here the film cuts to a scene where Rob and Hunter smack golf balls off the roof while yelling 'wassup' random and annoying, and ultimately pointless. Later, predictably just as Hunter is getting Lindy (Hudgens) to fall for him he's relegated to the 'friend zone' after she has to go visit her father in hospital following an OD. Needless to say, Hunter is a little gutted, he lets his rose garden die, and ignores all her calls. Rob makes up for the 'wassup' scene when he tells Hunter to return Lindy's call "hurt is girl talk for 'call now you bonehead!'".

So Hunter realises he's been a dick all along and rushes to catch Lindy before she leaves for Machu Picchu. Does he catch her? Of course! And following a mushy 'beauty is only skin deep' and 'I'm pretending I don't want to hurl' scene (surrounded by 100 American students and an intern holding up a card that says 'act surprise' every time Hunter does anything); they kiss. All together now: awwww! And suddenly he's Alex again, and kindly Kendra even cures Rob's blindness and Zola get's her kids permanent green cards through. How nice! Although I can't understand why Lindy just accepted the fact that Hunter disappeared and his phone ended up in Alex's pocket. So, my verdict? I think this film does exactly what it says on the tin. It's not called Beastly for no reason. It's an hour and a half of my life I won't get back. Give me Disney any day!